Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z

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But being unconditionally loved and being and feeling fully embraced by ones parents is always good! Let your kids know how special they are to you — tell them often that they are special and so loved. Thank them for being in your life — for the gift of their presence in your life. Every child, in their heart of hearts, loves their parent totally — they love you unconditionally as much or even more purely than the most beloved adult relative that you ever had when you were a child.

Benjamin Spock

Hi I just want to say what a brilliant article. As a 1st time mum of my DS, I was also warned against the dangers of bed sharing so I bought a moses basket for my DS to sleep in while still in our room. When he naturally woke in the night for a feed, I felt tired in the mornings. Then I spoke to my mum and she reminded me she had co slept with me and my siblings even though she had not breast fed any of us. Pingback: Co-sleeping and bed-sharing - Natural Parenting Forum.

Pingback: I'm going to be a horrible mother - Page 3. When I worked with diverse ethnic groups in the inner city I noticed that the children from cultures that slept together got along very well with their siblings and really looked out for each other. I notice the same about members of my own family and circle of friends. I think that saying great things about co-sleeping with your child and then beating up parents that do not choose to follow the same path makes you seem hypocritical, if a parent that does want to co-sleep with their child, that is their choice and all of you may have less confrontation on the matter if you respected the people who do not or should not because of medical reasons or otherwise.

Why is is that one parent must judge another, would it not be better for all of our children if we supported our differences, just as much as our similarities.

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It is also unfair to say those children who were separated from their parents in sleep or their siblings do not share a bond as strong. Each family is unique and the way each child views themselves and the world. How we interact outside our beds is of tremendous importance and not every part of who we are surrounds our sleeping situations, otherwise we would have a much more simple and world and people, but we are complex, just as this issue is complex as well. I worked for a woman who slept with her daughter for six weeks and then accidentally smothered her in her sleep, there were not too many blankets or pillows or a bed she became trapped in an open space by.

The mother was a great mom and on no medication, but she covered her baby with her body and she is now dead. I was a nanny to their other five children, but their mother never fully recovered from the loss the three years after when I came into their life and she still has not.

To those who successfully bed-share with their children, I am happy for you, but after knowing a woman made hollow by the loss and her guilt from it I have made the choice not to share a bed with my infant while I am asleep. That is my choice and I would think that other mothers would have the heart and mind to respect my choice, as you all ask the same from a mother who does not share a bed with their child.

A friend of mine wrote me this after reading the recent commentaries.

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I asked if I could post it, so here it is:. An Expat Westerner married and living in Japan to a wonderful Japanese woman, our first newborn arrived very early and was in Hospital for her first 6 months, now healthy and home, it just seemed natural to have her sleep between us. Dad has the night feeding duties and is a light sleeper, Mom takes care during the day with stretching and feeding.

Maybe we are just blessed, but this has worked out very well for us. Listen to your common sense, listen to your baby and do what you feel is best. I might add that we also have two kind kitties who share our bed as well…. I now have an 11 month-old and she has never slept in a crib either. I strongly believe in co-sleeping, not just in the same room as your baby, but in the same bed. I have always felt more comfortable having my infant right beside me rather than in a crib, all alone in another room.

It just went against my maternal instinct. I feel it helps to build a stronger bond with your child. If there is another adult in the bed, I recommend using two blankets. I find this works well with my husband who has the freedom to move around as he chooses and the other is for baby and me. My daughter sleeps very comfortably snuggled up with my arm under her and close to my body. And when I eventually need to get more comfortable I lay her down flat on the mattress righ beside me with her own little blanket or without one at all. Sleeping with your baby is so natural. Babies are formed and grow inside of us, they are born into the world and some assume to put them alone in another bed. The baby needs to be next to the mother and father in order to feel comfortable and safe. As a first time mommy of my 2 week old baby, I have a need to be next to her, and she has the same for me.

The way the person described the sleeping position above, is exactly how I sleep with my baby, and nobody told me how. We all have to move out of our western minds and start living from our hearts.

Always trying to work out how to do things intellectually when really our innate sense is there all the time if we allow it to bubble to the surface. My children are 1 and 3. This article brings to mind incidences with my youngest son, now nearly I co-slept with all my children, safely and happily. For my youngest however, I believe co-sleeping was a life-saver.

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Early on I realized I was waking up a few times each night to sit him up, pat his back, and get a response from him. After several days, and realizing that I was waking because he was experiencing apnea, I totally eliminated dairy from my diet he was exclusively breastfed. I had already noted during the day that my intake of some foods affected him and had cut back on dairy after the 2nd day. About a week after totally eliminating dairy, he no longer experienced apnea. Any time I cheated, had a small amount of ice cream, it would affect him.

I am certain that he would have been a SIDs statistic if we had not been co-sleeping. He can consume limited amounts of dairy now but I can always tell if he drinks a milk at school or otherwise has had too much dairy in a day because it affects his breathing, especially at night horrible snoring.

Co-sleeping saved my child. One of the comments was about how mothers naturally take the protective position when sleeping with their baby. I do that very thing, but wake up feeling very sore from staying in that position. Does anyone else experience this? I have this problem too. I have coslept with both my kids, the 2 yr old is now in his own bed but still in room and my 6 month old goes back and forth between the crib in sidecar position and with me in bed.

So she moves back and forth and I keep her swaddled during sleep. The swaddling really helps we sleep in a cooler room so no worries about overheating and with them being a bit firmer from the swaddling it is easier for me to assume slightly varried sleeping positions safely. My daughter coslept with my hubby and me most of her early child hood.

Several times over the years she would try it out for a night or two, but invariably returned to the companionship of a shared bed. I strongly attribute this to her early life snuggled safely and securely with her Mommy. With the baby removed from the bed and from the room he has easier access to sex.

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With the baby or child in the bed he does not have easy access to sex. If I ever have children they will sleep with me. So breastfeeding was out bodily contact! Sterilized bottles, boiled bed linens, anti-bacterial creams the germophobia continues! Babies are animals, just as we are. I see our society slowly learning the balance between cleanliness and the damage of sterility in the environment. I have 9 kids, all of them slept with me.

Several are grown, some are still little and sleep with my husband and me.

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Babies need to be with their mothers. What if something happened to them in there. You have to do what is right for your child, your marriage, your family. So many of you have argued very well for co-sleeping and I think your points are very valid and obviously backed up by a lot of good research and information.

My question, though, having not experienced co-sleeping, is how do you transition the child children into their own beds? My best friend and her husband co-slept with their child and now, at the age of eight, he is terrified to sleep alone. He is completely dependent on one of his parents being near him at all times. Reading these comments, so many of you have successfully transitioned your children into their own beds without a lost wink of sleep. What is the difference? What did you all do to make your children so comfortable when it was time to transition?

Children all vary — wildly — in their developmental stages, and those stages vary wildly in what order things happen. My daughter slept with me until age At about age 7 she began sometimes sleeping away — overnight visits to family or friends, trying out her own room we had it set up for her, but with the understanding it was available when SHE wanted it, so the expectation was there, but no pressure.

My daughter spoke her first words at 5 months, complete sentences by Clearly enough for strangers to converse with her by 18 months. MOST children still babble incoherently at 2 years — lucky for them no one was concerned about their inability to talk!!!! She began reading at age 8.

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As for the health of a marriage with a child co-sleeping? Sofas are great! While I respect your point-of-view very much and agree with it to some degree, I have to voice my concern that there IS age-appropriate behavior. Yes, children all mature at their own rates and those milestones need to be nurtured as they come and not pushed. Like you, my son was verbally gifted and was speaking in complete sentences by age one.

Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z
Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z
Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z
Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z
Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z
Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z Your Baby & Toddler: A Commonsense Guide from A to Z

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